Questions about Love and Dating for the 21st Century: Technology

Rate* the following behaviors according to the scale:
Totally cool / Cool enough / Acceptable / Unacceptable / Atrocious

Justify** your ratings.


1. Coming out of the closet (revealing that you are sexually attracted to members of the very gender of which you are a member) via clicking the appropriate boxes on a website such as facebook or myspace (or friendster, which Demetri Martin points out has itself gotten kinda gay).

2. Internet dating as a sociological experiment.

3. Internet dating in earnest.

4. Answering “Atrocious” to the previous prompt solely due to a freaking bizarre experience endured by a friend in middle school.

5. Breaking off contact with someone solely because his/her emails are awfully written, ASSUMING YOU WOULD OTHERWISE SUSPECT NOTHING TO BE WRONG WITH PERSON IN QUESTION'S NOODLE.

6. Giving so-called “bedroom eyes” to strangers until one of them tries to contact you here.

7. Creative uses of the apostrophe.

8. Creative uses of the testicles.

9. Attempting to secure a first date via text message.

10. Breaking off contact with someone solely because (s)he persists in arguing about a factual question*** which could be resolved immediately by the Internet, ASSUMING INTERNET ACCESS IS READILY AVAILABLE.

11. Exchanging cutesy text messages with a significant other while seated in a room with said other IN ADDITION TO friends who have expressed interest in carrying on a conversation.

12. Breaking off contact with someone solely because (s)he does not use gmail.

13. Being sexually attracted to an Apple product.


* e.g. by making a comment.
** e.g. by making a funny.
*** e.g. who won the NL MVP in 1991? or, is there a God, and if so, what's the deal with Jerusalem?