What's the deal with: Dippin' Dots

For years I have wondered about the neurological makeups of the set of geniuses which invented theIce Cream of the Future. I have some questions for them, but since they're no longer Prosthetic Wernicke readers, I will accept answers from anyone.

What is “dippin'” or even “dipping” about your dots? We, your potential but almost certainly not actual customers, can't dip the dots into anything. At best we can dip our spoons into the dots, but then you'd need to produce “dippin' spoons.” But that product name would fail to be: alliterative, irredundant, a referencer of anything well-established.

I have noticed that in the decade or so since your product hit the market, the future has only gotten closer. However, sales and consumption of your product don't seem to be increasing with time. So I wonder: when is the future? And, WHAT THE HELL HAPPENS IN THE FUTURE THAT WE WANT/NEED ICE CREAM TO BE SERVED AS A COLLECTION OF SMALL SPHERES RATHER THAN A SINGLE SCOOP OF CREAMY GOODNESS? Your Small Spheres Format has a number of disadvantages: inferior texture, inability to deftly handle chunks of (say) cookie dough or brownie, likelier to spill out of a cup or spoon, more expensive (I would imagine) to manufacture. So whatever happens in the future must be serious enough to outweigh these concerns. Or, are you trying to make ice cream crappier so that we consume less of it, and if so, why did you enter the business of selling ice cream/future ice cream?

ALSO, in light of the fact that you predict future consumers of ice cream will want a bunch of tiny spheres, why do you sell Dots 'n Cream? One projection goes: Future = Dots, Distant Future = Dots 'n Cream, Distanter Future = Cream, which is to say, the Distanter Future is now, PS your product blows. This would mean you're admitting defeat! So the scenario must be: Present = Cream, Future = Dots, Distant Future = Dots 'n Cream, because the Dots and Cream mated to produce an evolutionarily superior offspring.

FINALLY, How many members are in your club? What's the deal with them? How much does membership cost? What are the benefits? Do I get something for my keychain?